A Blue Flower
My personal feature documentary. After coming out as gay and leaving my religion, I set out looking for enlightenment — including fourteen days in complete darkness, searching for a mythical blue flower of healing.
01 — Bio
Bio
My journey as a documentary filmmaker has taken me from a fear-based religious system to a heart-centered spirituality.
During a live shoot for my first documentary, the man I was interviewing said that Castle Otttis — the mystical Christian castle we were filming in — was created as a place of peace for all people, including gay people. I couldn’t say anything out loud that day, but I later returned to the castle to film my admission to him: I was gay, and I needed a place of peace.
It took time to unravel my beliefs and set out after the big questions, but I filmed that too — A Blue Flower — so others could follow along and know they weren’t alone on the search. This kind of personal documentary filmmaking isn’t something I invented, and it isn’t the only style I love, but there’s something special about it when it comes from a genuine place. These days I’m interested in following other people’s spiritual journeys and seeing where they lead.
02 — Work
Selected Work
Castle Otttis
My first documentary, filmed at a mystical Christian castle built as a place of peace for all people — including gay people.
Out
An experimental short I wrote and directed about a boy who escapes from a room.
Gay Couples Institute
A documentary-style brand film for a queer therapy practice — intimate and human, finished with a light generative AI assist.
Happy Mother(s) Day
An ad spot I wrote, produced, and directed. Aired locally on CNN, ESPN, and FOX.
03 — Contact
Let’s Connect
Interested in spirituality, consciousness, or awakening? I’d love to hear from you.
nils@nilstaranger.com